breastfeeding class

First: have you ever been in a room full of pregnant women? It's kind of creepy, like some bizarre science experiment gone haywire.

Second: Our instructor tasked us with asking our husbands how "average" our nipples are. Because, in her experience, husbands are a much better judge of breasts than women are.

Third, and I quote: "...Your baby needs unlimited access to your breasts." It just got PG-13 up in here.

Fourth: Kevin was momentarily horrified when he though he'd have to eliminate peanut butter and nuts from his diet (as his lunch invariably contains a peanut butter sandwich, almonds, and dried cranberries). I think in that moment, he might have seriously considered formula-feeding BDR.

Fifth: Our instructor used a "My Buddy" doll for a visual aid, referring to it as her 10-pound baby. Funny for some mothers in the room, but my cervix just staged a protest. While BDR will not be 10 pounds (fingers crossed), she certainly will be a tub.

Otherwise, the class was informative. Now that we have feeding down, and KJ has permanent diaper duty, we just need BDR to get her act together and arrive already. (Can you tell someone's impatient? Just a little?)