BDR = show-off

My list of wanting to have this baby now is growing daily. Of course, Kevin and I are excited about meeting Clementine Rose or Max Power, but recently it occurred to me that I'd like to have the baby out for less...parental...reasons.

(1) A return to the ability to walk around as a private citizen. Apparently, being pregnant is akin to wearing a huge neon sign that says "please talk to me about my life!"

Have you ever seen the movie Soapdish? There's a scene where Whoopi Goldberg, trying to lift the spirits of an otherwise depressed Sally Field, takes her to the mall so that Sally Field can be mobbed by fans of her soap opera. That's kind of how I feel now: going out is just an attempt to bring glowing and warm attention to myself.

Especially when I'm just trying to bag my own groceries.

(2) Knowing what sex the baby will be. If only so I don't ever have to hear the question, "is it a boy or a girl?" again.

Although, I suspect it will still be in my future, as yesterday Kevin leaned over to me and said, "you know, we'll never know the sex of our babies. Ever."

So, when someone asks, I shrug my shoulders and say, "it's a surprise!" in my most cheerful voice, and, depending on the crowd, throw in, "well, I hope it's a baby."

(3) Stepping out of this bizarro spotlight that's been placed on me by virtue of the fact that I am a reproducing human.

So, obviously I have a little problem with being the center of attention, especially since it's not like I'm actually doing anything particularly cool.

I try to remind myself that people are just happy for us, but I'm getting a little tired of having attention drawn to me just by walking into a room.

(4) A return to the ability to call my parents without feeling guilty.

Because every time I call now, I think I get their hopes up.

(5) A return to the ability to plan more than three or four days in advance.

Like today, when we went grocery shopping, and we had no idea what kind of food to buy. Because what if we have a baby tonight and we can't cook these vegetables?

Argh. Only a few more days. (I think.)