Seriously, you can't make this stuff up. All so-true-they're-kind-of-scary comments are from second graders:
Second Grader #1: Are you having a girl or a boy baby?
Me: I don't know. It's a surprise!
Second Grader #2: But it is a baby, right?
Second Grader #1: Not an animal or something?
Me: Yeah. It's a baby. Human baby.
Second Grader #3: Is the baby a year old yet?
Me: I'm sorry?
Second Grader #3: How old is the baby? Is she a year old yet?
Me: Oh, God no. Just seven months.
I also was advised by two little boys, one of whom was dripping in blood from a non-injury related bloody nose, that I needed to be "taking better care of myself and that baby."
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